The Concept of 'Third Places'
How Wineries Can Create Inclusive Spaces and Fight the Loneliness Epidemic
As the world becomes more digital and the ‘loneliness epidemic’ grows, the need for authentic, in-person connection becomes ever more necessary. We human beings are social by nature, but the digital spaces that once promised connection (hi, social media) have left us feeling increasingly isolated.
Enter the concept of “Third Places,” a term coined by sociologist Ray Oldenburg that refers to social environments where people spend time between home (the “first place”) and work (the “second place”). These spaces act as a neutral ground for people to gather, socialize, and build community.
Think about your favorite cafes, pubs, and parks—these are classic examples of third places. They serve as hubs of community and, dare I say, culture, where regulars and newbies alike can find a sense of belonging. The importance of third places is so ingrained in our identity that many popular TV shows use them as something like supporting characters.
Consider Central Perk in Friends, Cheers in Cheers, MacLaren’s Pub in How I Met Your Mother, Luke’s Diner in Gilmore Girls, Monk's Café in Seinfeld, or even the comic book store in The Big Bang Theory. These were places where friendships flourished and storylines unfolded—places where the characters' lives intersected with each other’s.
Third places, whether in fiction or real life, foster community and offer a relaxed environment where people can meet and simply be. I believe wineries are uniquely positioned to become some of the third places we need to help combat the loneliness epidemic.
Tasting rooms, by their very nature, offer something more than a transactional experience. They invite people to linger, to share stories, and to connect. With the right intentionality, wineries can transcend their role as only a place to sample wine and instead become places where people gather and bond.
Let’s explore how wineries can build on this concept of third places to foster inclusivity and meaningful human connections.
What Makes a Great “Third Place”?
According to Oldenburg, a great third place offers the following characteristics:
Neutral Ground – A space where people can come and go freely, without obligations or commitments.
Leveling – Everyone is equal, no matter their social status or profession.
Conversation – Conversations, shared experiences, and meaningful interactions are the foundation of a third place.
Accessibility and Accommodation – The space is easy to access and accommodates a wide range of people.
Playful Mood – The atmosphere is light, fun, and relaxed.
These qualities are essential in creating a third place where people feel comfortable, accepted, and welcome. The more your winery embodies these traits, the more likely you are to create a community-driven space.
How Wineries Can Become a Third Place
Host Events That Focus on Connection
Community-focused events are one of the best ways to turn your winery into a third place. Instead of just focusing on wine tastings, think of events that encourage conversation, interaction, and connection. Some ideas include:
Brave & Maiden hosts a Dinner In series, where they invite guests to a seasonal meal (paired with their wines) and seat guests at a long community table (versus at individual tables).
Buttonwood Winery hosts cooking classes where guests learn how to make delicious seasonal meals they can pair with Buttonwood’s wines.
Clementine Carter Wines hosts a regular speaker series, inviting awesome people to talk about what they are most passionate about and they have regular attendees who come to learn something new!
These kinds of events position your winery as a gathering place where people come to connect over your wine.
Design Relaxed, Unstructured Spaces
Though I tend to like the reservations and seated tasting model most tasting rooms have adopted after the start of the pandemic, I also think we are somehow missing the opportunities for connection of the “belly up to the bar” days. People are drawn to spaces where they feel they can relax and be themselves. To create a third place atmosphere, consider designing areas in your winery that encourage unstructured socializing beyond tasting. Here are some folks I think have done this very well:
Though Brave & Maiden offers high-touch seated and structured tastings by appointment, they also have created a separate bottle service experience for folks who know what they like and just want to come and hang out in a beautiful space.
Yes, Industrial Eats is a restaurant, not a winery, but we can learn a lot from their dining experience. Though they, of course, have smaller two- and four-top tables, they also have a couple of long ‘community’ tables that can host large parties but, more often than not, allow for multiple smaller groups to sit together. I’ve met and conversed with folks from all over the world at these community tables and I always enjoy it.
Bodega Los Alamos is a wine bar that offers multiple large tables, small individual couches, and bistro tables. This is often the place my friends and I go when we want to gather, either formally or casually, and is the site of many community events. Sitting around their firepit, drinking a glass of wine, I’ve become friends with complete strangers and have had deep conversations with friends.
Foster Conversations and Interaction
A great third place thrives on conversation, so it’s important to create opportunities for guests to connect. You could set up communal wine tastings or group experiences where guests can bond over shared activities, include conversation prompts on tables or communal areas, or have suggestion walls where visitors can write down their thoughts about the wine, the setting, or anything they want to share.
The Other Room in Los Olivos offers a Blind Tasting flight on Tuesdays.
Book clubs meet regularly at Buttonwood Winery.
Lark & Sparrow has conversation starter cards on some of their tables.
Create a Welcoming and Accessible Atmosphere
Inclusivity is key to combating loneliness and fostering a third place where everyone feels welcome. Ensure your space is accessible to folks of all abilities, including making physical accommodations like ramps and accessible seating; offer options for non-drinkers; incorporate family-friendly spaces; and host events that celebrate different cultures. The culture surrounding wine shouldn’t be reserved for a select few.
Though not wineries, Naughty Oak Brewing and Lark & Sparrow have incorporated non-alcoholic and low-abv options into their menus for folks who aren’t drinking (or can’t drink) for whatever reason.
I recently attended a birthday party for a 3-year-old at Vega Vineyard at their secluded “Pop’s Place” Cabana, which is a family-friendly area tucked away from their main tasting room.
Center of Effort Winery regularly hosts pop-up kitchens to pair their wines with other cultural cuisines; one such event was their Family Table Dinner, which celebrated the heritage of their Chef, Lindsey Carroll, who is a proud member of the Crow Tribe.
Create a Light, Playful Atmosphere
Finally, a third place should be fun and playful!
Tons of wineries have board games and lawn games available to play.
Lark & Sparrow hosts Trivia Nights and Karaoke Nights.
Carhartt Winery and Presquile Winery frequently host live music and even full-blown concerts.
What If You Don’t Have a Tasting Room?
Not every winery has the advantage of a physical tasting room, but that doesn’t mean you’re excluded from creating a third place experience. There are plenty of ways you can still foster community and connection, even without a permanent gathering space. Here are some examples to get started:
Cote of Paint does pop-up gatherings at a local arcade.
Karen MacNeil and friends have created a whole campaign called Come Over October, encouraging folks to gather over wine.
Though they DO have a tasting room, Pence Winery offered cooking classes and wine pairings at home at the height of the pandemic. When they couldn’t host people at their tasting room, they put together meal kits with all the ingredients people would need and partnered with a local chef to walk the attendees through how to create these beautiful meals at home that paired with a curated selection of their wines.
Why This Matters Now: Fighting the Loneliness Epidemic
In a time when people often feel disconnected, wine brands have an incredible opportunity to create spaces and experiences that foster real, face-to-face interaction.
Whether through casual gatherings, fun events, or simply a space where people can come together, your winery can create a third place where community happens.